The art of listening to your children

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Raising children involves several expectations on the side of the parents. Often, parents really wish that their children turn out to be great as they imagined. There are different sides to this expected outcome and, sometimes it doesn’t go well as planned. As a parent, the art of listening to your children can facilitate the outcome of your wishes for your children. 

The young minds in your home are growing and will keep on evolving as they grow. Connecting with them as early as possible gives you the ability to help mould who they become.

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    We long to see vibrant, confident, secure, homely and kind children in our society. For this to become a reality, parents, guardians and teachers have to learn the art of listening to children.


    Listening or paying attention to your children is totally different from being manipulated by them. Their lives can be improved when they know they are being heard. Some detrimental damages can be avoided by listening to them even when they are not talking.


    Some of the ways that parents, guardians and teachers can listen or pay attention to children include:

    #1.    Give attention to their worries

    Children express themselves in several ways. As a parent, guardian or teacher, please give attention to your children’s worries or the children you are watching over. Some children struggle in different areas of their lives and some have lost their lives due to a lack of attention to issues that border them so much.

    In an interview granted by a grieving mom who lost her 12-year-old son, she said she regretted not listening to her son when he said he didn’t want to go back to school. She dismissed it without knowing he was being bullied and threatened at school. Eventually, they lost him at school due to bullying.

    Please give attention to anything worrying your child per time. You have no clue what they face out there when they leave your home, especially at school. Endeavour not to dismiss any matter, no matter how trivial it is.

    "Make out time for your children, groom them and don’t leave them to chance. Most importantly, pay very close attention to them."

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    #2.    Pay attention to their silence/ quietness

    Pay attention to your child’s silence or sudden quietness. When you notice that your once lively or full-of-life child has suddenly become quiet and rarely talks, please pay close attention. Do everything within your power to get to the root of whatever it is.

    Another mother whose teenage kid committed suicide also regretted not doing more to help her son when he was still alive. Apparently, the late son fell into depression, became quiet and didn’t talk much. He ended his life for lack of seeing any reasons more to live —which is devastating because there are a thousand and one reasons to live, they just need to be reminded.

    To avoid incidents like the one given above, pay close attention to your children. Yes, mood swings are real, especially during growth spouts, but still keep eye on every stage of life, growth and development that they may be in at every given moment.

    Love your children enough to keep an eye on them. Pay close attention and be there for them. No one can ever love them as you do. Display this love by caring for them and holding them up when they need you the most. Listen to your children!

    "The young minds in your home are growing and will keep on evolving as they grow. Connecting with them as early as possible gives you the ability to help mould who they become"
    #3.    Give attention to their growth and development


    Connect with your children as early as you can. Their growth, development and pretty much who they become are wrapped up in their upbringing and relationship with their parents.


    When you notice your child act otherwise in a particular area of his or her life, please pay close attention. If they are drawing backwards in their academics due to peer pressure and lack of interest, please pull them close and guide them through such a phase in their lives.


    Teenagers can have a weird sense of reasoning sometimes. When they start questioning a lot of things around them, they might push aside the morals you have taught them and choose to try out a lot of things. Please pay close attention to your teenagers and help them pull through this stage of their lives as well.

    Also, as children grow, some things might become worrisome to them especially with friendships and relationships, with your rapt attention on them and everything that has to do with them, you will greatly assist and direct them on such issues.

    #4.    Pay attention to their complaints


    When your child complains about a particular thing, please pay attention to their complaints. If your child freely talks to you, take advantage of that relationship and attend to their complaints.


    Some children may find it very difficult to summon the courage to voice out their struggles per time, this is why it is important for parents and guardians to pay attention to their children. The art of listening to your children will help you detect possible dangers and help you safeguard your children against such.

    di-raising responsible children in our homes and society 1
    #5.    Give attention to your children’s well-being – emotions

    You need to pay attention to your children’s well-being. Their emotional well-being controls their behaviour and zeal.

    Ensure your child is always positively charged up at home. When they are feeling good about themselves, they will be able to withstand negative vibes from people around them.

    Listening is an art, and hence not everyone has the grace to listen. Parenting exposes you to various virtues you must model to your children including the ones you are very comfortable with.

    Listen to your children. Be in sync with their emotions and moves. It is in the process of listening to your children that you build lasting relationships with them, especially your teens.

    The art of listening to your children should be a continuous venture until they become adults. Develop the art of listening. Study your children, understand their silent scream for help and pull them through different phases and stages of their life, growth and development. Family is everything! Make out time for your children, groom them and don’t leave them to chance. Most importantly, pay very close attention to them.

    Let’s continue to dazzle while raising our children!

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