What it takes to have an effective and functional family!

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Getting your family to work ensures unity, love, transparency and progress. A family that works is a type that join forces to surmount any obstacle, withstand all forms of negativity and hindrances, and attain their desired success in life. When a family works or functions effectively, it achieves more, progress, and it certainly becomes unstoppable.

A family is a team. In life, when you don’t give room for laziness, you begin to think progressively, and hence, succeed in whatever it is that you set your mind to achieve. This is the same with family. Don’t get it twisted, and don’t be deceived, family is everything! Family is the bedrock of human existence. Cherish your family whether you are together or separated for any reason.


There is no individual that doesn’t face one challenge or the other in life, let alone families. No family is immune to problems and challenges. Those are part of life, and you can overcome them together and keep moving on in life.


No matter what the issues are, you can start all over. You need to engage in the following to get your family to work. In addition, families that evaluate their positions, goals, plans, etc., can also use these points as a checklist to review their standpoints in life per time.

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    #1.    Review your past situations

    The Igbo tribe of Nigeria has a proverb that goes thus: “Onye na amaro ebe mmiri bidolu mabaya, agaghi ama ebe okwusilu ima ya”. This adage is translated in English as: “If you don’t know when and where the rain started beating you, you will most likely not know when and where it stopped”.

    This proverb sums up this point ­—review your past situations. Outline your past situations and pinpoint where you encounter friction in your marriage or family. Identify the root cause of certain behaviours or problems, and plan to dialogue with your spouse or family regarding such issues.

    When you properly evaluate your past situations as a family, you will know where to make improvements, applaud yourselves, and put in more work.

    #2.    Discuss your current status

    In life, you need to learn to tell yourself the truth always. As a family, learn to discuss your current status. Ask yourselves critical questions such as: (1) Are you happy with your current status (career, living conditions, etc.)? (2) Are there things that you could do better to improve your current status?

    Discussing your current status as a family brings you to the point of reality. If you are currently doing great in your goals and plans, then you will be better strengthened and motivated to keep on. And suppose you are not doing well enough as you imagined. In that case, the discussions will put you to check and invariably make you re-evaluate your strategies. Have you ever wondered why in a formal setting, group meetings occur frequently? Yeah… that’s it. You need to learn to discuss your current situation in order to stay on the right path.

    Call for a family meeting from time to time, ask questions, assign tasks, and discuss often to lubricate your relationship and stay on track with your goals.

    "Getting your family to work takes a lot to get going and get things done. What matters is to have the mindset to get your family working. Every other thing then follows."

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    #3.    Outline areas that need an upgrade or jettison some

    There are, by and large, some areas in your family life that need an upgrade or to be totally jettisoned. Endeavour to outline these areas and do the much-needed retouching on them.

    There might be programs or projects you need to discontinue or upgrade. Take time and do a critical analysis, after which you determine your next line of action.

    #4.    Make plans for the future

    It is always better to plan than fail to plan. In other words, make plans for the future. It is not a waste of time to plan properly for your future. Have certain things in mind that you aim to achieve and goals to reach.

    Making plans for your future will involve a lot of thought, research and quiet moments in order to truly search yourself and work in tune with who you are and what is on the inside of you.

    Planning for your future is not about writing a “to-do” list, no. It is about setting goals with a timeline and drawing from within to fulfil your true essence. You don’t copy others in their venture. Instead, you focus on becoming “you” through your personalised plans.

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    "Getting your family to work ensures unity, love, transparency and progress. A family that works is a type that join forces to surmount any obstacle, withstand all forms of negativity and hindrances, and attain their desired success in life. "
    #5.    Evaluate your efforts from time to time

    As simple as it sounds, evaluate your efforts from time to time. When you are on your path in life, ensure to keep taps on your goals and ambitions to ascertain whether you are still on course or off course to call yourself back.

    Distractions and mistakes can veer one off-track at times, hence, the need to review and re-evaluate yourself from time to time.

    #6.    Don’t quit/keep striving for your greater good

    As long as there is life, there is hope. Don’t quit on your dreams and goals. Keep striving for the greater good.

    Your expectations might not come when you envisaged they would, but don’t give up on yourself. Most times, your long-awaited miracle(s) show up when you least expected them.

    No matter what, keep the fight on. Fight to the finish line. Remember, nothing good comes easy. Becoming the best form of yourself will also not be cheap. In any case, keep moving as a family and don’t quit.

    #7.    Take breaks and rest

    Learn to take breaks and rest as a family when you need to. Your body will break down if you don’t listen to it and take a break. Taking a break to rest revitalises your body. This is not a form of weakness or laziness, it is vital to your health and well-being of your family members.

    Know when your body needs rest. Apart from your body communicating to you that it needs rest, know when to excuse yourself from the hustling and bustling and take a break. You need it from time to time. Every member of your family needs this from time to time.

    #8.    Encourage and celebrate yourselves often

    When you are down, encourage yourself. When you don’t get the vibes or feel like it, encourage yourself and keep moving. And when you reach some milestones, celebrate yourself. No matter how little the progress is, celebrate yourself and your family.

    It is never going to be easy to push yourself to make good progress in life. Working legitimately as a family to achieve your desired goals is worth celebrating. Endeavour to encourage and celebrate yourselves often.

    Getting your family to work takes a lot to get going and get things done. What matters is to have the mindset to get your family working. Every other thing then follows.

    As a family, have individual and collective plans to achieve your desired goals in life. When every member of a family plays their role right, there is every assurance that there will be peace and progress.

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