"Barely three weeks after our elaborate wedding ceremonies, I got pregnant. Of course, everything has always been working out so well that it was difficult for me to imagine challenges in life. I was nine weeks gone – life was happening very typical for me as a pregnant woman. My doctors were pretty happy with my health; I would say, I had a clean bill of health. One afternoon, after some minor domestic tasks, I decided to take a nap before my husband returns from work. By the way, that was becoming the routine ‘cos, I wanted to give my unborn child all the golden opportunities to develop well.

Not quite 45 minutes, I was regaining full consciousness, and at the same time, I felt an unusual warmness around my thighs, only to realise that my shorts were drenched in blood. A thousand and one questions/thoughts ran through my mind – How? What happened? When? Little did I know that it was the beginning of my journeys with ‘miscarriages’. So far, I have had six miscarriages. Every time it happens, everything in me says – Not again!”

The above real-life story was recounted by Sandra*. She is probably one of the strongest women that I have met who has gone through unimaginable pains and experiences but have come out to encourage others by sharing her story. She wrote me an email and asked if she could share some encouraging words with Dazzling Insights audience. I was thrilled, even before I knew her storyline. It wasn’t until I signed an anonymity forms with her that she started sharing her heart-wrenching experiences about miscarriages with me.

Despite her experiences, she has chosen to encourage many women out there who are going through miscarriages. Sandra did a bit of research as she tells me her story, and she puts the following statistics to my face: 

• About 80% of miscarriages occur in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy (i.e. the first trimester).
• Miscarriage rate is about 10% - 20%, while rates among all fertilization is around 30% to 50%.
• Approximately 5% of women or couples have two miscarriages in a row. 
• In 2012, over 10 million miscarriages were estimated to occur in the developing world.

I summed up courage to ask Sandra how is it that with all your experiences and trauma, you are this strong. She replied to me: “that is exactly why I reached out to you because I want to put my experiences our there, perhaps it will help someone.” Immediately, I requested her to hold on. I grabbed my writing pad and started noting down all her points. The real-life stories that she shared have turned into articles that I believe will strengthen women and couples going through a similar ordeal.

If you are going through miscarriages or know anyone that experienced it, please hear Sandra out – I consider her words golden. More so, knowing the unmitigated audacity of hope and courage that made her reach out to me is worth the read. She has the following pieces of advice to give as ways that have helped her to cope with her serial miscarriages.